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Dreams...can they predict something?

This has started to bug me quite a bit. I had a dream a little while back dealing with some good friends of mine, it's somewhat hard to translate, but I was sad, and the way I translated it was, I may never see them again. It's hard to tell what real meaning dreams have in this world, but this one in particular hit me right to the core. If I never see them again, I wish them the best and hope their lives run smoothly. I pray that I have no more haunting dreams, everything always seems to be based on bits and pieces of my memories...

College..Christmas Break...about time.

Well, it's almost over! There is technically 3 days of actual school left, although I will be there for a week and 2 days cause I'm responsible, the grindstone has finally approached...and it is quite stressful...I hate finals, they hate me and so on. I have made so many new friends this semester...it's pure awesome, and they actually came in many varieties instead of just boring. My life at Walmart is still going on, and of course it's still a pain in my back side. I have of course been battling the cold this week, and pray that it is almost over. My christmas break is going to be awesome, I will be sining at a Candlelight service and have 2 Christmas parties on that same day! Oh...I hope next semester goes by smoothly...

Where do I belong?

Lately my heart has been feeling very heavy...and my spiritual fire feels like it is only flickering. A lot of changes have occured and I guess maybe I'm not used to it..the changes I have made to myself have somewhat been successful, but some situation I still couldn't get passed and that makes the burden even heavier. People at church have begun to notice I'm not my usual self and I won't tell anyone why...if you read this blog, you will know some of my information. Lately I have been feeling very down in my church, I feel like I'm not growing spiritually anymore and it makes me very sad, I feel that things are falling apart, and this may seem cowardice, but it makes me have thoughts of wanting to move on to a new church...but I hope that these feelings will subside. There is a song I heard a few times by Michael W. Smith called Place In This World, and it used to never affect me in anyway, but now I sometimes cry when I hear it, because I can now understand and relate to the words. Here are the words and the song.

Place In This World

The wind is moving
But I am standing still
A life of pages
Waiting to be filled
A heart thats hopeful
A head thats full of dreams
But this becoming
Is harder than it seems
Feels like im

Chorus:
Looking for a reason
Roaming through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world
Not a lot to lean on
I need your light to help me find
My place in this world
My place in this world

If there are millions
Down on their knees
Among the many
Can you still hear me
Hear me asking
Where do I belong
Is there a vision
That I can call my own
Show me im

Chorus

Why Can't I Let Go?

Well it's been a while since I have posted on this blog, but I felt a need to today. As the title says and asks: Why Can't I Let Go? As of now I have been struggling with myself and people. I have talked to a close friend of mine who is a minister about this, and he has helped significantly, but that question always pops in my head...I believe it is now dangerous to have people you knew close to home be chosen as a great friend or possibly hero. It might be just me, but I get far too attached to people and now I regret that unique trait I have. I have already been in the process of trying to "forget" certain people as best I could to relieve some emotional stress, but I just can't seem to do it...I guess if people have that great an impact on me I'm not ment to forget them, but when those I look up to don't communicate with me it brings my spirits down significantly. I don't know what's to happen in the future, but God obviously has a reason for why I feel this way, and all I can do is just go with the flow. The song by Michael W. Smith: Friends gives me quite a peace of mind, but at the same time can bring tears to my eyes due to the fact that I don't always feel that way.

Friends

Packing up the dreams God planted
In the fertile soil of you
Cant believe the hopes hes granted
Means a chapter in your life is through
But well keep you close as always
It wont even seem youve gone
cause our hearts in big and small ways
Will keep the love that keeps us strong

Chorus:
And friends are friends forever
If the lords the lord of them
And a friend will not say never
cause the welcome will not end
Though its hard to let you go
In the fathers hands we know
That a lifetimes not too long to live as friends.

With the faith and love gods given
Springing from the hope we know
We will pray the joy youll live in
Is the strength that now you show

But well keep you close as always
It wont even seem youve gone
cause our hearts in big and small ways
Will keep the love that keeps us strong

Chorus

Thoughts on Moment of Truth

I just saw the show Moment of Truth last night, and it is a very comical show, but ethic wise it is very poor. My parents seem to think it will cause a great deal of trouble and I do too. One thing I noticed is that it asks way to many questions that can cause divorce rates and possible death rates to increase. This game is not only unethical it's totally embarrassing. Is $10,000-$500,000 really worth all the risks that this show can cause?

Happy Easter

As I grow older I learn not to take everything for granted, but I still fail at times. I realize that I have a very good life, and it's all thanks to the man who died for me, Jesus Christ. Without him nothing I have accomplished spiritually would have any value. Without him, the awesome people who have helped me spiritually would really matter. Although it has been a cold Easter, I know that the gorgeous weather will return, and I will continue to enjoy it! Has your heart been touched this Easter or maybe another occassion or just anytime? God has a plan for me and everyone else, and that plan is going to be awesome!

Awesome God

Happy New Years!!

I found this to be quite original, but funny...the things you can do with Mentos. At least they weren't wasting the stuff by drinking it. Be careful tonight, and be responsible!

Merry Christmas!

This is funny...

Have a Merry Christmas everyone!

Happy ThanksGiving!

I love this time of year, even though my professors were big losers and gave me homework for Thanksgiving break, and yes I still have some assignments to do. Thanksgiving used to be just another holiday for me, nothing special...but this year it was different. Normally I'm under a ton of stress and I'm under some stress this week, but also this week my heart was at total peace! My heart was so peaceful that I wanted to start crying, it was a strange feeling. This peaceful heart of mine, was probably a prayer that I had done quite a long time ago, and it is now being answered, and I didn't even know how to handle it. I'm very thankful for this peace of mind! What special prayer that you made has been answered during Thanksgiving week? Did it prove to be quite a powerful experience? God is always looking after us, and I think he knows exactly what we need at the very right time we need it!

Marshall Slowly Returns

Every Marshall game I go to they win, and really I don't think it is luck anymore, I think they are slowly progressing to the team they once were in the past, a team that was if I have been told properly to be just as good as WVU. Last nights game was just awesome in the 1st quarter, but during the 2nd quarter I started getting a little edgy, the 3rd quarter was also a bit risky, but then the 4th quarter came around and they won with flying colors. I hope they make it to the bowl game!

UCF Fall Retreat

Today is the first day of the Retreat, I can't wait for it to begin! It's been so long since I have been around all my friends and this will be an awesome experience for me! An even bigger surprise is Jake being there as a speaker. These three days are going to be pure awesome, and will relieve some of my stress that college has brought upon me this week. I know everything is going to be great. Just 12 more hours till its time haha.

Forgiveness, The Stress Reliever

After hearing about forgiveness in my youth group class, it finally hit me, I do have some issues in my past that I need to just forgive, so I can move on with my life. Although it's really hard to forgive this situation, even though it's a pretty stupid one, it's time I finally made peace and moved on. My challenge to you is, are you able to let go of a grudge that has been with you for years, or are you still willing to keep that stress wrapped around you for many more years?

Baptize Me

In conclusion to the baptism series at church, I now present the lyrics to the song Baptize Me, by Jaci Velasquez. To hear the actual song, e-mail me and I will send it to you.

In the desert of my shame
I have found myself to blame
Now I thirst for innocence
And Your blood is there to quench
Pour Your life into my soul
Let the cleansing waters flow
Make me white as snow

CHORUS:
Hear me as I pray
Wash my sins away
Drown me in Your grace
Baptize me
As my lips confess
Fill this emptiness
With Your holiness
Baptize me

Touch my eyes and give me sight
Father, bathe me in Your light
At your feet I'll always be
Until the day Your face I'll see
Let Your words consume my heart
Lead me to the deepest part
And the healing starts

CHORUS

(Scripture)
There is a river of life flowing from the throne of God (Rev 22:1)
There is One who came by water and blood
There is the Spirit who testifies to this (1 John 5:6)
Anyone who believes in the Son has this testimony in his heart (1 John 5:10)
Behold the Lamb of God, who washes away the sins of the world (John 1:29)
Baptize me

CHORUS

Falling Behind?

Life for me right now is beginning to get complicated, with this past year of so many people moving away, and me starting college, it hasn't occured to me until now, but am I losing touch with everyone, am I truly falling behind? I don't know how to stay connected with people anymore and as I grow older I lose so much focus. I thought I had a dramatic change about myself, but sometimes I wonder if it was just a temporary change that I thought could change my whole perspective on life. I look at pictures of people, pictures of fun times they spent together doing something meaningful, and I realize that I don't have pictures like that which means that I'm probably doing something wrong. I don't want to be the person who looks at other peoples pictures and wish that I was in it too, I want to be the person who gets to have memories of great times I had with others. Is this another situation that requires some time to accomplish?

Marshall University Vs. WVU who will win?!

Okay people! I know it seems pretty slim, but I'm sticking with Marshall, even if they lose, they are still my number 1 team. Let's see if a miracle can happen today!

We Are Marshall...


Update:
We lost! Oh well....there is always next year! You guys still did a good job to me!

It's My Birthday!!

Today is my birthday, and I'm sooo old, ok so I lied, 19 isn't that old of an age, but I'm still closer to 20!

It All Begins Now

Well, tomorrow is the big day, the day I start college! It's going to be a whole new world, and I can't wait to meet all the new people, and make new friends! I'm also very scared at the same time, since I have to learn everything all over again, and the challenges I will face will be a lot more difficult. I pray that this will be a very successful year!

VBS Thoughts

You could either call this an aftermath or a great event...and for me it was both ways, when it comes to the aftermath part, I'm just very tired, but when it comes to the great event, I feel that these kids learned something very important this week! I thought this was an excellent VBS and I'm glad I was able to be a part of it! The best part about it was the sining and dancing, and yes Toney dominated all of us at that hahaha. If we have one next year, I hope it's even better!

On My Cross

I found this video, with the song sung by FFH called: On My Cross, this song always brings tears to my eyes, for the fact that Jesus gave his life for each and everyone of us. Warning, this video is directly off the movie The Passion, and some scenes may be graphic.

On My Cross - Featuring clips from The Passion


Here are the lyrics, which I hope our church could learn, because this is an awesome song with a meaning so great!

On My Cross - FFH

How wide is Your love
That You would stretch Your arms
And go around the world
And why for me would a Savior's cry be heard

I don't know
Why You went where I was meant to go
I don't know
Why You love me so

Those were my nails
That was my crown
That pierced Your hands and Your brow
Those were my thorns
Those were my scorns
Those were my tears that fell down
And just as You said it would be
You did it all for me
And after You counted the cost
You took my shame, my blame
On my cross

How deep is Your grace
That You could see my need
And chose to take my place
And then for me, these words I'd hear You say

Father no
Forgive them for they know not what they do
I will go
Because I love them so

Those were my nails
that was my crown
that pierced Your hands
and Your brow
those were my thorns
those were my scorns
those were my tears that fell down
and just as You said it would be
You did it all for me
and after You counted the cost
You took my shame, my blame
on my cross

Those were my nails
that was my crown
that pierced Your hands
and your brow
those were my thorns
those were my scorns
those were my tears that feel down
and just as You said it would be
You did it all for me
and after You counted the cost
You took my shame
my blame on my cross

After You counted the cost
You took my shame, my blame
on my cross.